Big Girls Don't Kauai

     Good morning and greetings, back-to-school fans. That’s right, last week it was mid-August, and my kids were happy as linguini and clams to back in the
classroom. For me, it’s been two weeks since my return from vacationing in the South Pacific and I still have the aloha spirit sprinting daily through my mind. Kauai is a slice of paradise one doesn’t soon forget, and besides, I’m going to be milking these pictures from the Garden Isle longer than I reminded my parents I made the Dean’s List at Syracuse back before there was history.

     So while I still have the island fever, let’s learn some more fun facts about our 50th state.

     According to the early descendants of Steve McGarrett, the Hawaiian Islands were one of the last places on Earth discovered and occupied by humans. The first Polynesians landed in Hawaii after leaving their home in the Marquesas Islands some 2,500 miles away, in search of pineapples, papayas and plate lunches with two scoops of rice and a scoop of macaroni salad.

     As I mentioned last week, modern contact was not made until Captain James Cook first anchored off Kauai in 1778. He named this sweeping archipelago
the Sandwich Islands after his sponsor, the 4th Earl of Sandwich and his wife, the 1st Dutchess of Soup.

     Hawaii is the most isolated population center on Earth. It is 2,390 miles from California, 3,850 miles from Japan, 4,900 miles from China and light years from Fort Lee, New Jersey. Much like my midsection, it is the only state whose land area is increasing as a result of lava flows from volcanic eruptions and the addition of Roseanne Barr to the Big Island.

     Hawaii is the only state that is is not geographically located in North America, although some wonder if Arizona still belongs in the mix. It was one of only
four independent countries before becoming a state, joining the Republic of Texas, the Vermont Republic, the California Republic and the Banana Republic, where new fall styles are now available for him and her.

     Kauai offers seven distinct microclimates and breweries, from lush interior jungles to very dry areas on the west side. Mount Waialeale is at the center of the Garden Isle and is the rainiest spot in the world. Ancient Hawaiians recognized the importance of this location and built a temple on the summit along with a gift shop.

     How it rains over 400 inches a year on the middle of the island while just 18 inches drop on the west side is a mystery to me and to the surviving members of Fleetwood Mac. Fortunately for the Tourism Bureau, much of the rain falls at night and the showers are brief, like my resolution to follow through on projects. But island rains bring rainbows, and that’s where dreams that you dare to dream really come true. Just ask any happy little bluebird.

     Hawaii consists of eight larger, populated islands and 124 small, uninhabited islands, reefs, atolls b-tolls, and the Rolling Stones. It spans the distance of 1,524 miles, making Hawaii the longest island chain in the world. The islands are the
subtropical tops of the biggest mountain range in the world. Hawaii’s tallest mountain, Mauna Kea, is higher than Mount Everest and Yao Ming when measured from its base, which is on the ground floor of the Pacific Ocean, from which there is no elevator, so you have to take the stairs up.

     Hawaii is the only state that grows coffee and whose majority of people are non-white. Except for big wave surfers, It has the highest life expectancy in the United States. Aloha is a Hawaiian word that means hello, good-bye and slow down, this isn’t the mainland. The oldest newspaper found west of the Rocky Mountains is the Sandwich Island Gazette in Hawaii, which has a great sports and lava flow page. And finally, by law, no building on Kauai is allowed to be built taller than a palm tree. Suck on that for a while, Empire State Building fans.

     For this week’s pictorial pleasure, we are going with a variety pack. We start out at the golden sand of Lumahai Beach, one of the most photographed beaches in the world where Mitzi Gaynor in “South Pacific,” washed that man right out of her hair” using a coconut conditioner. We then move on to the basketball court at the Hanalei Community Center. It’s always nice to be shooting jumpers with waterfalls cascading down the mountain in the background.

     We then cruise over to Opaeka’a Falls, which flows year round off the north branch of the Wailua River. The names dates back to the day when shrimp swarmed the river and were seen frolicking in garlic sauce at the base of the falls. Next we head to the south shore and Poupi Beach, where the waves are smashing against the rocks in an area teeming with sea turtles and more crabs than you’ll see on Chinese New Year. Then about 100 yards from this spot, I snapped a shot of this highly endangered monk seal. The Hawaiians call them llio holo i ka uaua, which means “dog that runs in rough water.” (As a side note, back in Jersey, they used to call me, llio hoho i ka italiano, which means “boy that walks with thin crust pizza.”)

     There are less than 1,000 monk seals left on the planet and is was a treat to take a quick snooze with this one. We close out the tour with a shot of the world’s largest snail that I shot cruising along the front lawn at our house in Hanalei. With a cornucopia of amazing colored birds, exotic fish and tanned locals, Kauai is truly a visual paradise.

     We’ve still got more to come on the photo front, including island flowers, south shore sunrises and red clay waterfalls, so stay tuned, Magnum P.I fans.

     To see these photos from the Garden Isle, click on http://www.SunriseSantaCruz.com/blog.