Feeling glad about Dad

Longstanding tradition tells us that in June we mark Father’s Day, even though the role of “father” is less and less about tradition. The role of “dad” is steadily moving away from the well-defined notion of breadwinner and disciplinarian to a dynamic one of deep involvement in family life. Father figures are an integral part of the family unit. Involved fathers and father figures have a strong impact on a child’s development, peer relationships and emotional stability, as well as success in school and other activities. Children look to their fathers for direction, example and support. For many, the role of father is no longer confined to nights and weekends. Today’s fathers are often working alternative schedules or working from home, and many are highly involved in the daily routine, seven days a week. Yet, fathers and father figures may struggle with their role. Just like mothers and mother figures, many fathers seek to find balance between traditional and new expectations. Many are fulfilling an expanded role for which they do not have a role model of their own. Triple P can give fathers practical ideas for developing positive relationships, encouraging desirable behaviors and teaching their children new skills. Spend quality time with your children everyday. Dedicate quality time each day to your child. Focus on their needs and emotions. A simple hug and a few moments of affection can make a world of difference to a child who may be yearning for attention and perhaps displaying unwanted behaviors. Do a weekly activity together. Participate and encourage activities your child likes. If your child shows an interest in arts or sports, help them get involved. And play an active role in their activities. Your involvement can enhance your child’s interest. Work as a team with your family. Set ground rules and agreements about discipline as a parenting team to ensure you are on the same page when a situation arises. Make sure that you are both giving and receiving practical support from your partner– parents need to be there for each other. Make work a priority at work and family a priority at home. It is easy for fathers and father figures to bring home stress and problems from work. Make it a point to develop a clear transition from work to family time, in order to be able to engage with children at home. Fatherhood and societal ideas of the role of “dad” have changed drastically over the last several decades. From once a cool and reserved provider role, fathers have evolved into an active co-parent – and their role in a child’s healthy upbringing is crucial. That’s definitely something to celebrate this June. Susan True is the Executive Director of First 5 Santa Cruz County, which administers the Triple P - Positive Parenting Program. Triple P is made available locally by First 5 Santa Cruz County, the Santa Cruz County Health Services Agency (Mental Health Services Act) and the Santa Cruz County Human Services Department. Triple P is scientifically proven and is the world’s leading positive parenting program. For more information about Triple P, including classes and one-on-one meetings to help parents handle everyday parenting challenges, visit triplep.first5scc.org, www.facebook.com/triplepscc or www.youtube.com/triplepsantacruzco. To get a copy of the Triple P Pocket Guide for Parents or find a Triple P class or practitioner, contact Stephanie Bluford at 831-465-2217 or sbluford@first5scc.org